The White Male Oppressor Speaks

Here is an update on our “Bad Mother of the Year” award winner, Aimee L. Sword, who I introduced you to  back in September of 2009 in a piece called “mom-thinks-son-is-cute“, has now after almost a year pleads guilty to having inappropriate carnal fun with her biological son that she gave up for adoption as an infant. Aimee, who is a 36-year-old, was sentenced in her trial to nine years to 30 years in prison.

This poor excuse for a mother apologized  to the court and witnesses when she was sentenced Monday in Oakland County Circuit Court after she pled guilty to one count of first degree criminal conduct. Her son who she had this first degree criminal conduct with was 14 at the time and is now 16. Just a note to young men out there: screwing a teacher may give you bragging rights but humping your mom not so much.

How this all got started was this princess of poor decisions tracked down the boy she gave up for adoption on the popular social networking site Facebook in 2008 after not receiving the usual annual update from the adoptive parents in Grand Rapids. Now we know why, huh?

Aimee’s attorney, Mitchell Ribitwer told the New York Daily News, “When she saw this boy, something just touched off in her – and it wasn’t a mother-son relationship, it was a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship.” Hmm something just touched off in her? Really? What caused this touch off of touching? I am sure there was no underlying issues with attraction to young boys for her. (note sarcasm)

Here is the kicker during her liaisons with her son, this sick broad was married and lived with her husband and five other children. God I hope none of them are boys. But I guess it won’t matter she is in prison for up to 30 years.

Until Next Time: Be Afraid Be Very Afraid

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Here is one from the “Really? Congress, really?” file. A new bill sponsored by Rep. Edolphus Towns (D-N.Y.) really brings forth the question, is this really necessary? In a move that is being hailed (by the 5 feminists that know about it) as a victory for woman’s rights, Rep. Towns proposed a bill that would require the number of toilets available for women to equal or exceed the number of toilets and urinals in men’s restrooms.

This is a bill that will finally address this long standing issue that hasn’t been a concern until last month, about women no longer being oppressed by the evil male phalacrocy by having too few places to pee. But what are people saying about this?

Former District mayor Sharon Pratt weighed in on this desperate situation as she told the house committee that “the disparity in restrooms is glaring, inconvenient, enormously inefficient and downright unfair.” Also, Kathryn H. Anthony, an architecture professor at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, said that being forced to wait in line for restrooms is a form of gender bias. Ms. Anthony also stated “Delaying voiding can result in serious medical conditions,” she said in remarks submitted to the committee.

However, in a slap in the face to all the gerbil bladders out there, Robert A. Peck, the GSA’s public buildings commissioner, said his agency generally does not get complaints about the lack of facilities for females in office buildings. I do not see how that can be I mean with the economy in the shitter and the worst oil spill in history going on right now how could he possibly not see the dire situation that toilet disparity causes.

Good for you congress, putting national security and the economic stability of this country on the back burner so that you can address this life threatening issue (jack asses) at taxpayer expense. Now I am sure that they are going to have to run the numbers by the CBO in order to make sure that it is not cost effective or efficiently handled, after all it is Congress.

Until Next Time: Honey-bucket

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Today I would like to bring you an interesting story from the “I make poopie” file. Here’s an absolute gem that I came across in the Washington Post: apparently a man from Amherst was arrested and convicted of trying to steal dirty diapers from a home and has been sentenced to 30 months of probation and 200 hours of community service. He was also ordered to go through a psycho-sexual evaluation. (things that make you go…)

So here it is, one more chink in the armor of my faith in humanity. But anyway back to the story. So this absolute genius named Dyllon Makuski, who is just 20 years old and already sniffing diapers was detained by a homeowner when he tried to break into the guy’s Amherst home last September. When the sheriff showed up, (and here’s the kicker) they found him with six dirty diapers in his pockets. Initially the complaint said that the reason he entered the house was because he liked to wear diapers and thought there might be some inside. However, this is not quite the case. According to the complaint; when he was asked by the sheriffs whether he intended to steal the dirty diapers he said, yes.

You know I see a lot of weird news stories that involve a lot of weird and mentally unstable people but I must say I have not seen one from an idiot such as this in a long time. I mean imagine that everyone. He was just walking down the street one day minding his own business and then off in the distance he heard a crying child and thought you know perhaps I should break into that house and steal some dirty diapers. In my time I have heard of all kinds of strange sexual fetishes from Dendrophilia (sexual attraction to plants) to Vorarephilia (aroused by the fantasy of being eaten) but I can say in all honesty this is a first. Of all the twisted crap I have seen in my life I have never, until this point seen a man who gets his jollies off  of dirty diapers. I guess even fecalphiliacs have to take baby steps. Sorry couldn’t resist.

The part that amazes me is that this guy only got sentenced to 30 months of probation. He broke into a house to steal used diapers. For God sake saying this guy needs a psycho-sexual exam is like saying Perez Hilton is gay, it is kind of obvious. This guy needs a little more than an exam – he needs a soft little rubber room and should not be allowed to play in societie’s reindeer games anymore. I think that if you get your rocks off by breaking in to people’s homes and trying to steal used baby diapers then it is time that you get put somewhere where you do not come out.

Until Next Time: Courage

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